Author Archives: Mike Lesiuk

Fake Movie Posters

A lot of fake movie posters are really lame. These ones are not. I like the time gap theme that’s going on. Example: …from Peter Stults at Behance Network.  
Posted in Random | Leave a comment

Some Unfinished Lists

SCARY THINGS 1. Sharks that shoot guns. 2. Guns that shoot sharks (!). 3. Sharks that fly and shoot lasers out of their eyes and steal drugs and carry smaller sharks and 4. BAD METAPHORS 1. A gun that cuts right to the truth. 2. A flower that smells like a different flower. 3. An [...]
Posted in Jokes | Leave a comment

New year, new term

New year, new term Aside from beginning my TA duties today (the onerous task of attending one lecture and picking a tutorial time), today I *really* begin studying for my “Discourse and Text Analysis” field exam. The exam reading list asks you to pick two out of five subcategory reading lists. I picked “Semiotics” and [...]
Posted in Me | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Ideas for Happy Stories

A mail man and a dog learn to set aside their differences, and together they raise $10,000 for charity. When a suicidal, divorced mathematician thinks life can’t get any worse, he stumbles upon a time machine, goes back in time, and watches his parents fall in love. Then he takes some pictures of dinosaurs. Then [...]
Posted in Jokes | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Point of View, Subjectivity, and Otherness in A Song of Ice and Fire

(Note that at the time of writing this post, only four books have been released in what is expected to be a seven-book series. Also note that there are some spoilers towards the end of this post, which I’ve indicated with a rather prominent warning.) One of the unique things about George R.R. Martin’s A [...]
Posted in Literature | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

If you go to an alternate universe…

…and meet the alternate version of your significant other, are you allowed to make a move? I think this is the kind of thing you should decide on with your spouse beforehand. You know, like in some kind of formal contract.
Posted in Jokes | Tagged | Comments closed

The Passage by Justin Cronin

I am not a fan of the vampire craze in today’s media, because I think that vampires are being horribly misused. Being bitten by a vampire should be a very bad thing, not simply the means by which one gets a fun superpower. If you want to write about vampires, you can do whatever the [...]
Posted in Literature | Tagged , , | Comments closed

The laziest movie pitch

Alright, so picture this: a kid gets his face eaten and then there’s a big investigation. And… uh, well that’s it.
Posted in Jokes | Tagged | Comments closed

Confessions of a Sleazy English Professor

I’ve had tenure for awhile now, but I’ve only recently found the courage to teach my “Graphic Novels as Literature” course. And by “Graphic Novels as Literature,” I mean a couple old issues of Amazing Spider-Man I found in my basement, where Spider-Man fights the Hulk, and then they team up and beat the #$@% [...]
Posted in Jokes | Tagged , , | Comments closed

Bright Star by Jane Campion

“A poem needs understanding through the senses. The point of diving in the lake is not immediately to swim to the shore, but to be in the lake, to luxuriate in the sensation of water. You do no work the lake out. It is an experience beyond thought. Poetry soothens and emboldens the soul to [...]
Posted in Literature | Tagged , , , | Comments closed